Long COVID has transformed my life into a series of pauses, commas, and quotation marks. Each day is punctuated by stops and starts, shifts and adjustments—a life dictated by the unexpected twists of a condition that forces you to rewrite your story.
The Pauses
Once upon a time, my life was a seamless narrative. Each day flowed from one chapter to the next: waking up, rushing to work, squeezing in a sport session, cooking dinner, and planning the next big adventure. It was fast-paced, predictable, and, frankly, a little exhausting. But then Long COVID came along and turned that novel into a book of fragments.
Now, my life is filled with ellipses—unfinished thoughts, sudden stops, and forced pauses. My body dictates the punctuation: a racing heart says, “Full stop.” Fatigue whispers, “Take a breath.” And so I do, often without warning, because there’s no other choice.
The Long Waiting
If life is a story, Long COVID has added a lot of waiting rooms to mine. I wait for my heart rate to settle, for the fog in my brain to clear, for a day when I feel “normal” again. I wait for doctors’ appointments, test results, and—dare I say it?—a cure.
In these endless intermissions, time seems to stretch like chewing gum—sticky and interminable. But these pauses have also taught me to find a new rhythm, a melody I’d never played before. I’ve learned to notice the small, beautiful details in life: the warmth of a cup of tea, the chirping of birds outside my window, the simple act of breathing deeply, or my daughter’s cheeky smile before bed.
Moving Forward, One Step at a Time
Moving forward isn’t about sprinting ahead; it’s about finding your pace. For me, that means taking life one deliberate step at a time. Some days, those steps are hesitant and unsteady; other days, they’re confident and sure. But every step is intentional, measured, and carefully calibrated—a bit like walking a tightrope.
Energy has become my most precious currency. I count and budget it like a miser, knowing that overstepping my limits could mean days of payback in the form of crushing fatigue, pain, and breathlessness. It’s not just about surviving the day; it’s about making the day survivable.
Patience: The Uninvited Virtue
Patience and I weren’t always friends. I was the kind of person who wanted everything yesterday. But Long COVID has forced us into an unlikely partnership.
I’ve had to learn patience with my body, which no longer works the way it used to. Patience with others, who may not understand why I can’t commit to plans or why I need to rest so often. And, most importantly, patience with myself—for the days I can’t “push through” or live up to my own expectations.
The Temptation to Overdo It
“Maybe today, you can do a bit more,” says the little voice in my head. And sometimes, I listen. Sometimes, I push past my limits, chasing that fleeting feeling of “normalcy.”
But the cost is always higher than I expect: days spent in bed, too drained to move; a brain so foggy I can barely think; the guilt of knowing I’ve set myself back for a glimpse of normalcy. Long COVID has taught me the hard way that “doing more” doesn’t mean “living better.” Sometimes, it means living less.
A Different Life, but Still Mine
My life may not be the one I envisioned, but it’s still mine—a patchwork quilt of pauses, waiting, and slowdowns. These interruptions have brought unexpected gifts: moments of introspection, newfound gratitude, and a deeper appreciation for life’s small joys.
I’ve learned to celebrate victories that might seem trivial to others: cooking a meal without collapsing, walking a short distance without needing to rest, having a conversation without losing my train of thought, or sharing a hot chocolate with my daughter without spending the entire day in bed. These are my milestones now, and they’re no less worthy of celebration.
Conclusion: Finding Strength in the Slowdown
Living with Long COVID is like writing a story with a broken typewriter. There are pauses, glitches, and missing letters, but the narrative continues. It’s not the story I planned to tell, but it’s one of resilience, adaptation, and courage.
Slowing down doesn’t mean giving up. It means finding a rhythm that works for you, even if it’s different from the one you had before. It means embracing the dots, commas, and quotation marks of life—the pauses, reflections, and changes—and recognising that they, too, are part of the journey.
Disclaimer
This article is based on personal experiences and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult a healthcare professional for guidance specific to your condition.
Long Covid Journey 